We interrupt your regularly scheduled SITE INACTIVITY (You’re the one who’s not active, RJ. -Ade) for a video clip I found on the interwebs! Batman: Arkham City was released on the PS3 and 360 last week, but sadly, PC gamers won’t be able to play it until November 15th :(. But PC gamers, being the master race, are willing to wait. And while we wait, check out the new Nightwing DLC trailer!

It’s no secret that I love Dick, Dick Grayson that is. My blog had an awesome Nightwing theme before Ade took over and changed things(read: everything). I am now TWICE as excited! But since my poor excuse of a laptop, twice zombified, will probably commit seppuku if I attempt to run the game, I will have to visit my good friend and Comicgasm contributor Nate Nakpil every week to play Arkham City. Robin(Tim Drake) and Catwoman DLCs will also be released.

 

And I am angrier than ever. Why are X-Fans such masochists? Even more than Teen Titans fans but slightly less than Legion fans. God damn.

 

 

I’m an on-off X-Men reader, but I haven’t kept up in the last few years. Mostly because, well look at the cycle. So before going back, I asked longtime and hardcore X-Fans what I should expect. Most wondered why I even do this, I get more than enough masochistic RAGE from Teen Titans.

So here’s what happened while I was away:

 

Shadowcat is back:

We last saw Kitty Pryde at the end of Joss Whedon‘s very successful run in Astonishing X-Men, arguably one of the best arcs in the past decade. She’s freed from her giant intangible hollow bullet circling space forever and is back on earth, but with a catch: she’s stuck in her intangible form and can’t speak without wearing a suit. But she gets better. Don’t ask how but she does. But who brought her back?

Magneto joins the X-Men:

(continue reading…)

We interrupt your regularly scheduled blog inactivity for some THWIP-tastic news! Our friends at Vivid Entertainment released yet another one of their Porn Parodies, this time it’s your Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man! Directed by Axel Braun, the guy that made Batman XXX possible and hilariously accurate. And if you’re part of the majority of our target demographic, you should be aware of their series of Superhero Porn parodies as well.

Starring Capri Anderson as Mary Jane Watson, Ash Hollywood as Gwen Stacey, Brooklyn Lee as Natasha Romanoff/Black Widow and Sarah Shevon as Betty Brant. I ain’t listing the male cast because fuck you I don’t wanna! It’s weird that they decided to include Black Widow but not Black Cat. Heck, add Carlie Cooper in the sequel just so we can mock Joe Quesada! Do it, Vivid friends! Do it!

Rob Black gets a special mention because he plays J. Jonah Jameson. J. JONAH JAMESON! In a porn parody! That is both hilarious and awful at the same time! This is a funny change of pace compared to reading people getting butthurt over Marvel’s decision to make the new Ultimate Spider-Man Black/Latino don’t you think?

 

PS. Just to scar you for life: Aunt May is in it. You are now having a mental image of her in a Spider-Man porn parody film. Manually. brb, laughing forever.

 

That’s right, I said it. Just look at that! This is from the last page of Red Robin #24 and look just look at it! Notice the look of terror and confusion on Tim’s face, not knowing what horrors the *gasp!* vagina  would do to him.

I wonder if post-reboot Tim would still be like this..does DC have the balls to have the first openly gay Robin? Will he finally get laid before the DCU implodes and reboots? Why is he so afraid of vaginas? So many questions unanswered!

Yes, this needed it’s own filler-post. Shut up!

Okay. Pretty much EVERYONE is angry at DC right now, and for good reason. But let’s take a blue ring and sooth that RAGE for now and see something GOOD for a change.

I’m talking about Green Lantern Emerald Knights, DC’s latest direct-to-video feature film. And it is oh so very good. So good that I went back to liking Geoff Johns for a while. Man, that is crazy! Warning: this review is spoilerrific!

 

You know why it’s so damn good? Because it’s not centralized on just one character, *COUGH* HAL JORDAN *COUGH* but about the diverse members of the Green Lantern Corps. Hal got to be the story teller to an animu-looking rookie Arisia though. *insert statutory rape joke here*

(continue reading…)