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There’s absolutely no words to describe how awesomed I was when Grant Morrison first announced that Bruce Wayne is going to start franchising Batman and is going to turn it into a brand in “Batman Inc.". Seriously, it doesn’t matter if you hate or love Morrison’s run on Batman, I think we can all agree that he did more for the character for the last 20 years over any other writer. And Batman as a brand is the logical (or illogical) next step.

In the new series, Batman will create a team of super-heroes who will be wearing his colors. The team will include Dick Grayson, Knight and Squire, El Gaucho and eight others. Again, Morrison says, “it’s all about the branding.”

Incidentally, this new era of Batman also means that we get a costume change:

I don’t need to explain how much I absolutely loathe the yellow oval on Batman’s chest. Although I grew up watching the Adam West TV show and reading Bronze Age Batman comics where he is always depicted with the yellow oval and symbol on his chest, I really prefer the oval-less symbol. It gives me the impression that Batman is a much more badass character that way.

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Truth be told, I’m not really a fan of Judd Winick’s writing. Yeah, he’s the guy who can write really great character stories if he wanted to, but he’s not really someone I can see writing a timeless story. I don’t hate him with as much fervor as another Comicgasm editor *cough RJ cough* but I’m no fan either.

Which brings us to his arguably most controversial storyline, Under The Hood, in which we see – SPOILER ALERT – Jason Todd, the second Robin, come back from the grave as the new Red Hood to haunt Batman and the man responsible for his death, the Joker. It’s been adapted for this DC Universe Animated Original Movie, Under The Red Hood, and it is awesome.

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Honestly, I thought the previous Superman/Batman DVD released by DC, Public Enemies, was just okay. You know, aside from the heavy-handed homosexual undertones, there wasn’t really anything in Public Enemies that makes it stand up to Justice League: The New Frontier or Crisis On Two Earths. And it’s pretty obvious by this point that I have no love whatsoever for Jeph Loeb’s recent works, and while Ed McGuiness’s art is decent, it’s not exactly my cup of tea.

So I’m seriously not excited to see the new Superman/Batman: Apocalypse movie.

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There’s really nothing much to say here. This issue is fantastic. You see, Batman just shows up immediately after the end of Final Crisis, emerging from the cave as the hairy-chested love god that he is…

… and he proceeds to wear a gigantic bat, and beats up a bunch of evil cavemen led by Vandal Savage. How could anyone not love shit like that.

If you’re one of those creeps that thought Batman XXX wasn’t enough, then you’re in for a treat! Vivid Entertainment just made a new movie imprint: Vivid Superheroes. That’s right, boys and girls, a new production dedicated in making comic book porn parodies! DREAMS DO COME TRUE!

Stolen from Bleeding Cool: In a press release, Vivid founder Steven Hirsch is quoted as saying;

The parodies under this new imprint will pay tribute to the world’s most popular comic heroes. Axel already started pre-production on a parody of Superman, which will be followed by those of The Green Hornet, Spider-Man, Wonder Woman, Captain America, Thor, and The Incredible Hulk. We made the decision to create the imprint after working with Axel on Batman XXX: A Porn Parody, an Axel Braun Productions movie to be distributed by Vivid. Axel truly did an amazing job with it, and we agreed that together we could mine the really rich treasure of superheroes and have a lot of fun doing it.

Remember what Ade and I said in our Iron Man II review?

RJ: Random thought: They should totally make a porn parody of Iron Man, Lexi Belle as Pepper? Yes please!

Ade: I agree. I can imagine it already: “Well, Pepper, you’d have to know why I’m called Iron Man. You see, iron NEVER goes soft. So yes, Pepper, I am made of iron DOWN THERE! In case you’re too dim to figure it out honey, my dick’s made of iron! Because it never goes soft! That’s why it’s made of iron! That’s they call me Iron Man! Because I never go sof–”

RJ: Wait, what?

Ade: I just realized that last paragraph I’ve written was probably an all-time low.

WE’RE NOW THAT MUCH CLOSER TO THAT! FUCK YEAR!

Can you imagine the horrible/awesome things that they can make?

Superman Comes Again

Fucktastic Four

Watchmen XXX – 120mins of Manhattan’s Penis starring Peter North

STAN LEE CAMEOS! OH GOD, DO IT!

Okay, I’ll stop now.

PS. RIP Frank Frazetta ;_; Good night, sweet prince.